Being Fat = Not Deserving of Love... WTF?!

I wasn't sure what I would write about here today... I had a few ideas, and was having trouble choosing... and then I came across this:

"I'm not sure what will happen, but there is something wrong with a man (or woman) loving someone who is unhealthily over or underweight. This isn't directed at you as I don't know what size/weight you are. But if you have a woman who is say 130kgs and her partner is OK with that, then there is something wrong with him. Nothing wrong with loving a 'big' girl, but when you hit morbid obesity and your health is affected, no man should be attracted by that. And the same if a woman has severe anorexia. There is a weight range at which people should find other people attractive, when it's beyond that, it's a little disturbing IMHO."

It was in response to something I'd written about relationships changing after one partner loses a lot of weight. I mean, from things I've heard and read about, some people do end up with relationship problems as a result... more often than not a result of the one who didn't lose the weight getting jealous of the attention the one who DID lose weight is now getting by the opposite sex.

A lot of people responded with their various tales... but yeah, the above... just wow.

I guess that not only should I tell DP he's disturbed for putting up with how disgustingly huge I am, but that he should leave me, because really, fat people like me shouldn't be in relationships. Except, perhaps if BOTH parties are the same size? Does that make it okay? Or are fatties not allowed to love other fatties as well?

While I understand that physical attraction to your partner IS important, surely there needs to be more than just thinking, "Yeah, she's hot," to get a man to want to be in a relationship with someone... right? What about the type of person they are? How they make you laugh? How they seem to understand what you're talking about even though others would be confused as hell? How about the fact that you're able to have an intelligent conversation with them, rather than just talking about nothing but TV shows or fashion or gossiping about people you know? Superficial conversations are fine, but I know that when I'M in a relationship, I need more than that.

And what about UGLY people? You know... people that are a "good weight," but don't really have the prettiest noggin. Do you have to have something wrong with you to want to be with someone who has a face for radio? Or is that okay, because ugliness has nothing to do with health?

Look, I get that people should want for their partner to be healthy - but I think that even those in a relationship with an obese person feel that way. Except for those extreme feeders who like nothing more than to watch their loved one get fatter by the minute, stuffing cakes and scones and fried donuts into their mouths... but I'd say those are few and far between.

The thing is though health and weight don't necessarily have anything to do with each other. I mean, I'm unhealthy. I know it. I'm also fat. I could be skinny and unhealthy too though... how many of us know some continously skinny person who lives of junk food... they just never put weight on? Or skinny people who binge drink? Skinny people who do drugs? Skinny people who smoke? Skinny people who starve themselves to remain the size they are? It's clear to me, that just because you're considered a healthy weight, doesn't mean that you're healthy... so how can someone suggest, with a straight face, that fat people are only loved by deranged people?

Really... what kind of crazy person thinks this? I mean, there's obviously one... she's wrote that after all... I suppose she and her partner are perfect weights, who don't have an unhealthy bone in their bodies. Yeah... I'm SURE that's the case... *roll eyes*

Some people don't think that there's such a thing as "fat hate," but just reading the above goes to show that at least 1 idiot out there is spreading the hate around.

So let's take a look at some of the "Rules Fat People Need to Obey,"...

*Fat People must never wear anything that reveals any part of their body that may be considered offensive. This means that swimwear must be head-to-toe... and not skin-tight... despite the fact that when you go into the water, you clothes stick to you... so perhaps you should just forget swimming altogether, fatty, even though it might help you lose weight, and is usually good exercise for those with weight problems, since it takes the pressure off your joint... but hey, you're fat and therefore unsightly... so save the eyes of the poor innocent skinny folk, and stay home.

*Fat People must not eat anything unhealthy. Ever. It doesn't matter if it's your birthday - no cake for you, lard-arse! If a skinny person sees you at the local food court having a cheeseburger, then they are safe to make the assumption that all you ever eat is take-away, and as such, tsk-tsk you, perhaps even say something to your face about your choice of meal (despite the fact that they're eating the same damn thing, and that the calories and fat content in that burger remain the same regardless of how fat you are), and probably go whinge to their friends about it (even those online - nothing beats a "OMG, this fat chick is eating maccas at the shops - PUT IT DOWN FATTY AND GET A SALAD!" FB update!). Even some of the healthier options are potentially fattening though - wholegrain pasta is STILL pasta. Lite cheese is STILL cheese. Your lean sausages still contain SOME fat. Probably better to eat nothing more than lettuce each day... mmmm... deliciously boring lettuce...

*Fat People shouldn't have kids. Yep, you shouldn't. If you need a fertility specialist, he/she will tell you so - I mean, if you fell pregnant naturally while fat, then cool... but we're damn sure not going to ENCOURAGE fatties to procreate. The thought of that would be icky, right? I guess that probably has associated health issues... but hey, I think that choice should be up to you. And what if you don't need help falling pregnant? Well, you're abusive. Yep, abusive. Just having a child when you're obese is abuse behaviour in itself. It's pretty much the same as backhanding your kid if it asks you for a drink of water. Having a fat parent can cause severe emotional stress for a child you know... so fatties, stop breeding! And god forbid a fat person ends up with a child on the chubby side - every Tom, Dick and Harry will tell you off for giving your kid anything more than carrots and water... depsite the fact that they'll happily take their own SKINNY kids to maccas for a nice bit of burger-binging. That's okay though - the fat and calories and salt and sugar in junk doesn't do a damn thing to skinny people... they're allowed to eat as much rubbish as they want... so long as they don't dare gain weight!

AND NOW...

*Being Fat means NO LOVE FOR YOU!

So yes, fat-hate does exist, and it runs rampant... it's like racism... so many people say, "I'm not racist but..." only to add something as obviously racist as, "I hate them darkies." Well, fat-hate is the same. People pretend (or do they seriously believe it?) that they're not nasty to fat people, that they don't hate us, that they believe we deserve the same rights and respect as everyone else... but then go on to say something that is hurtful for the entire overweight/obese population.

Yeah, you're right, fat-hate doesn't exist... and it certainly doesn't extend to children...

Oh well, I may be fat, but at least I'm not a judgemental tosser who doesn't know when to shut her effing mouth.