I don't think my body gives a shit what it SHOULD be doing...

I'm so annoyed with my doctor.

I think he's a nice guy, which is why I keep going to him. He's kind and he's rather fatherly... but I'm not sure he's a great doctor.

I've had high blood pressure for ages now, and he keeps shunting me. Last week when I saw him it was 155/116 (thereabouts - he did it a few times). He told me it could be that White Coat thing where you only get high BP when you're at the doctors... but at home it's normal... so asked me if I could get it checked at home and then come back in a week. Well, I didn't do it at home, but did it at the in-laws place because father-in-law has a BP monitor. I checked myself on it a few times during the week and it was always high. Highest being 180/117. That's heart-attack stuff right there.

Well, today I went back, and my reading was something like 160 (or 170, I can't remember now) over 112. Still bloody high.

However, instead of just putting me on meds, which is what I was expecting (and hoping for - I don't want to die at 25 from a stroke or heart attack!), he brushed me off AGAIN and told me to come back in a week AGAIN.

I think I'll go see someone else about it. I don't want to keep being brushed off and then die because he kept ignoring the problem.

The reason he ignores it? Because I "shouldn't be so high at your age." Um... my body doesn't seem to give a shit what it SHOULD be... it obviously IS this high at MY AGE... so do something about it dammit! If I was old, he'd have probably put me in hospital by now... or just loaded me up with drugs at the very least.

I've been googling the symptoms too, and it seems that I do have some hypertensive symptoms. Hypertension symptoms are fairly mild though which is probably why I didn't pay too much attention to them... but having read them, I now have a reason for why I feel the way I do.

I feel dizzy a lot of the time, for example. I always put that down to tiredness or something... I didn't think much about it, even though it's annoying. But apparently that's a symptom of hypertension.

Same with nausea. I feel sick a lot, but for no apparent reason... and the high BP could very well be that reason it seems. Again, I never bothered worrying about it because it's not something that completely destroys my life, but it's not pleasant either.

And then the tiredness. I am so freaking exhausted just from being alive... and no wonder! My body is spending all its energy making sure my heart pumps blood around my body... it doesn't have enough energy to do much else.

I think I'll go see someone else and get on some medication. I'd rather not go on medication, but I'd rather that than die... which is something I keep worrying about lately.

According to something I looked at a week (or more) ago, 82% of people who have weight loss surgery no longer have high blood pressure issues... something like that anyway. It was high anyway. I'm pretty sure it was 82%. Anyway, even if it's different, it's similarly high. So I mean, I guess another good reason to have my surgery... I'm not even worried about surgery. I'm just worried about dying before I get there thanks to my stinking blood pressure problems and my doctor not bothering to help me out with it other than sending me away all the damn time.

Let's hope I don't die before I next post... lol.